What is wrong with me???????

Well, I haven't ranted and raved in a while, so I guess I'm due a good venting!

First of all, something is wrong with me and I don't know what. I've got it pretty good. My significant other works his butt off at a job he hates and comes home and (usually) helps me out with the baby and stuff. Lately, I've gotten really lazy. I get home and I just want to plop on the couch and not move...pretty much leaving him to get dinner ready and the baby fed and bathed and put down. I don't even know why I'm being like this either. I know I do have a right to be tired. I work all day, same as him, but I love my job and it's not the least bit stressful or physically strenuous like his is. I just can't seem to get my butt in gear. If you're reading this honey, I'm sorry!

Not only that, but I've been really short with him lately. I've been getting mad at him for the dumbest stuff. Actually, I've kinda had a short temper with everyone lately. I have a lot going on in my life...an ex-husband that needs to get a freakin life, my dad just had surgery, my grandmother has cancer and isn't doing so hot, money's been really tight, etc.....but I don't want to deal with ANY of it. I keep telling myself that if I don't think about it, then it will go away. I know that's not the "healthy" thing to do, but it's easier for me.

I keep thinking about the past...back when my biggest problem was what I was going to wear on Saturday night, or what excuse I was going to give my mom when I just had to stay out later than my curfew...where did those days go? I miss being carefree. I guess everyone does. I've been thinking a lot about my past lately. So many choices I wish I could take back. There is so much I would do differently, but if I were able to go back, I wouldn't be who I am today....and I gotta say, I'm pretty proud of who I have become. There was a time when I was just a total mess. I was pathetic.....that person is gone now. I finally snapped out of that and realized that I can overcome any obstacle......which leads me to believe that I will snap out of this lazy, bitchy stage that I'm in now.......ok I'm not sure what the whole point of this blog was, but I feel a little better now!


Smile! A new day is coming!