Friday Flash 55 - A trip to Home Depot...

Mary saw a teapot and asked the manager "How much?"
"$300." "Wow!" Mary exclaimed.
She described the hinge that Charlie had sent her for.
He went to get it and asked, "You wanna screw for that hinge?"
"No, but I will for the teapot."
And that’s why you can't send a woman to Home Depot.


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Friday Flash 55 - The Christmas Season is upon us!

Three men died and met Saint Peter.
"You must possess something symbolizing Christmas to get into heaven."
The first man held a lighter "It’s a candle"
St. Peter nodded.
The second held keys. "These are bells."
St. Peter nodded.
The third man held a pair of panties.
St. Peter raised his eyebrow
"These are Carol’s.”

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Friday 55

I can't waste time, so give it a moment
I realize nothing's broken
No need to worry 'bout everything I done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back, got a new direction
I loved you once
Needed protection
You're still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo



Ok, this is probably cheating, but my creative juices just aren't flowing today. This is the chorus of a song that I really like. It's actually 59 words, but hey, close enough, right? I chose it (1) because I heard it on my way to work this morning and it's stuck in my head, (2) because I have my own intrepatation of it and it's kind of fitting with some stuff that I've figured out about myself this year. The song is, I'm assuming, actually about a boyfriend or something that she's moved on from; but to me, it's more of a conversation between me and my former self. I've changed tremendously over the past year and overcome some really huge obstacles and when I hear this song, I picture myself talking to my "old" self. "She'll" always be a part of me, but it's time to move on and be a better person than I was. Sorry if that doesn't make sense...and sorry for breaking the rules!



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Today's Friday 55...Sorry it's a little late!

My blonde neighbor ran up to me jumping for joy!

"Guess what!!!"

"What?"

“I’m pregnant!”

"That's great! I couldn't be happier for you!"

"There's more! We’re not having just one baby. We’re having TWINS!"

…How she knew that, you ask???????....

“Well, I got a home pregnancy kit in a TWIN-pack. Both tests came out positive!"


This was inspired by a joke I got in my email today!! Click here to find out more about Friday 55.

Friday Flash 55

He watched as the sun made her skin sparkle and the waves tickled her feet. He was startled as they made eye contact. She smiled, inviting him to join her in the sand. He couldn’t contain his excitement as he bent down next to her. Suddenly there was a horrific noise.... That damn alarm clock!

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HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND!

Friday Flash 55; Tasha's Wishes

Searching for seashells, Tasha found an old lamp, rubbed it, out came a genie. He said "You get three wishes, but your ex-husband gets double."
"I wish for a mansion."
“Granted.” her ex got two mansions.
"I want a million dollars."
“Done.” her ex got two million.
Then Tasha said, "Scare me half to death."

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DON'T FORGET TO SIGN MY GUESTBOOK AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE!!!!!!

Friday 55 - The Princess and the Suitor

The King desperately needed to find a suitor for the princess.
"The first to satisfy her will marry her and rule the kingdom!"
They came with jewelry, flowers, dresses and more, but got not even a smile.
Finally, a man bearing nothing asked, "What is your desire?"
She smiled and led him into her castle.

P.S. Please sign my guestbook at the bottom of my page!!!!

Have a good weekend!

Friday Flash 55

When is it over?
When does it end?
When does it stop?
Will I ever mend?

No more noise!
No more screams!
No more alarms
Waking me from my dreams!

Wait, what’s that I hear?
What is that you say?
The end is near?
Why? Because it’s FRIDAY!!!!

I hope everyone has a GREAT weekend!!!!!!

Friday Flash 55 -- This is for Ambre!

Everything is going wrong
I’m having a bad day
It’s raining and thundering
Nobody’s listening to a word I say

I don’t wanna write
Got nothing to talk about
But according to Ambre
I gotta dig the giggle out:

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? Ha ha!

Friday Flash 55

Ok...this is my first one and I really didn't know what I was doing, so go easy on me!

“Hard work pays off, right?”
“Don’t expect much, bossman’s cheap”
Nah, they’ll see that my time and effort’s getting me that big bonus.
Bossman handed me the envelope with a smile, “Great job this year.”
I pictured dollar signs as I opened it…
“A donation has been made in your name to the Celebrity Rehabilitation Fund”
WTF????????